Okay, so you’re staring at this cute little furball, and you’re thinking, “Are you a mister or a miss?” Figuring out how to tell if a cat is male or female isn’t always as simple as people make it sound. Especially if the cat is still a kitten. I mean, they don’t exactly wear gender tags, right?
Whether you’ve just adopted a kitten from a friend or found a stray that’s moved in and claimed your couch, knowing your cat’s gender can actually help with everything from naming to vet visits.
And yes, behavior can be a clue… but it’s not always reliable. In this article, I’ll walk you through the basics (and a few not-so-basic tips) on how to tell if your cat is a boy or a girl. Let’s dive in—tails up!
First Things First: Age Matters
Before you even start trying to figure out your cat’s gender, you need to know one thing—age plays a huge role. It’s much harder to tell the difference between male and female kittens than it is with adult cats. When they’re super young (like under 8 weeks), things just aren’t fully developed down there, and honestly, it can be a bit of a guessing game.
Vets can usually make a good guess by 4-6 weeks, but even they sometimes get it wrong. So don’t beat yourself up if you’re confused—it’s totally normal.
The Classic “Lift the Tail” Method
Alright, let’s get into the physical stuff. If your cat will let you (some are more… private than others), gently lift their tail and take a look underneath.
You’ll see two openings:
- The anus (closest to the base of the tail)
- The genital opening (below the anus)
Here’s where it gets a bit awkward.
In male kittens, the openings are spaced farther apart, and the genital opening is more circular. You might notice a bit of space between the anus and genitals that looks like a small pad or bump. That’s where the testicles will be (or already are in older cats).
In female kittens, the openings are closer together, and the genital opening looks more like a vertical slit. People often describe it as looking like an “i”—anus on top, slit on the bottom. Kinda weird, but helpful.
Testicles or No Testicles? That Is the Question
In adult male cats, testicles are usually pretty easy to see unless the cat has been neutered. They look like a furry little pouch right below the anus. If your cat’s neutered, though, it might be trickier. The testicles are gone, but there’s usually still a little bit of space between the anus and the penis.
For female adult cats, there’s no pouch or bulge. Everything looks much closer together and, well, smoother.
But again, don’t be embarrassed if you’re not 100% sure. I once thought my friend’s male cat was a girl for like a whole year.
Behavior Clues: True or Misleading?
So, people always say male cats are more cuddly and females are more aloof. Or males spray and females don’t. But the truth? That stuff isn’t always reliable.
Sure, intact (non-neutered) male cats are more likely to roam, fight, and spray. And female cats in heat can get vocal and restless. But once they’re fixed, those differences usually fade out. So behavior can give you some clues, but it’s not really a sure thing.
I’ve met clingy female cats and super shy male cats—personalities vary a lot.
Still Unsure? Ask the Vet
If you’re totally stuck and don’t want to keep calling your cat “they,” just bring them to a vet. A professional will be able to figure it out in like two seconds. Seriously. And honestly, it’s a good idea to get a checkup anyway, especially if the cat is new to your home.
Also, if you’re planning to spay or neuter (please do—it helps with overpopulation), the vet needs to know the gender anyway.
A Few Extra Tips
Okay, here are a couple of bonus bits I’ve picked up over the years:
- Color can sometimes hint at gender. Calico and tortoiseshell cats are almost always female because of genetics. Orange tabbies? Way more likely to be male, though not always.
- Littermates aren’t always the same sex. Don’t assume just because two kittens look the same and came from the same mom that they’re both boys or both girls. Cats love to keep us guessing.
- If you’re adopting from a shelter, they usually label the sex, but… yeah, they get it wrong sometimes too.
Final Thoughts
So there you have it—your crash course in how to tell if a cat is male or female. It’s not always an exact science, especially with tiny kittens, but between checking the physical features, watching behavior (kind of), and maybe getting a vet’s opinion, you’ll get your answer eventually. And honestly, once you know, it doesn’t change much about how awesome your cat is. Boy or girl, they’re still gonna knock stuff off the counter and demand food at 3 AM, right?
Anyway, good luck with your furry little mystery!
